Quagdoggat is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, thoughtless dugong.

Quagdoggat created time and space six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quagdoggat, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Quagdoggat, he will turn you into a dog.

Quagdoggat's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Quagdoggat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep eight birds in a large pit.

2. Always help monkeys.

3. Never remain prostrate at dawn.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never wear corsets.