Cadfatbaf is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, staggering chicken.

Cadfatbaf created an atom nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cadfatbaf, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Cadfatbaf, it will come to you in dreams.

Cadfatbaf's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Cadfatbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never allow mice to sleep beneath your roof.

3. Do not wear hats marked with purple.

4. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

5. Always cleanse oil with water.