Kaparnflig is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, thoughtless raven.

Kaparnflig created an atom two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kaparnflig, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Kaparnflig, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Kaparnflig's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Kaparnflig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about asteroids.

2. Never speak aloud of signs.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.

4. Put Kaparnflig first in all things.

5. Do not count beyond four during ceremonies.