Betbellcip is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, blissful shrew.

Betbellcip created a top quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Betbellcip, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Betbellcip, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Betbellcip's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Betbellcip's Holy Commandments

1. Never touch blood while blessed.

2. Always wash your face before prayer.

3. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Always keep your back turned to the north at sunset.