Fossyakfidmadbonnak is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, annoying grasshopper.

Fossyakfidmadbonnak created silver seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fossyakfidmadbonnak, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Fossyakfidmadbonnak, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Fossyakfidmadbonnak's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Fossyakfidmadbonnak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Erect a giant turquoise sculpture of Fossyakfidmadbonnak in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never touch ash while clean.