Nigvagbed is a god.

It takes the form of a large, uncaring porpoise.

Nigvagbed created a Higgs boson twelve years ago.

If you believe in Nigvagbed, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Nigvagbed, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Nigvagbed's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Nigvagbed's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.

2. Do not count beyond eight during ceremonies.

3. Nigvagbed loves badgers, so they must be honoured.

4. Always check lakes for frogs.

5. Do not commit murder.