Quillcubcad is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, vain sheep.

Quillcubcad created parasitic wasps four million years ago.

If you believe in Quillcubcad, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Quillcubcad, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Quillcubcad's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Quillcubcad's Holy Commandments

1. Never fashion tools from wood.

2. Never think about quantum field theory.

3. Never go into blue rooms.

4. Never prepare onions during autumn.

5. Do not utter prayers while touching nickel.