Zakfebjigfad is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, thoughtless coyote.

Zakfebjigfad created an atom three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zakfebjigfad, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Zakfebjigfad, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Zakfebjigfad's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Zakfebjigfad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak sacred words in spring.

2. Always count to four before sleeping.

3. Do not speak about peanuts.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Never think ill of sick manatees.