Xinjonzak is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, unjust cow.

Xinjonzak created life four million years ago.

If you believe in Xinjonzak, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Xinjonzak, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Xinjonzak's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Xinjonzak's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse ash with water.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never wear yellow corsets on sacred days.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate nematodes.

5. Rats are not to be trusted.