Nelldagsaften is a god.

She takes the form of a large, unsympathetic bear.

Nelldagsaften created life four million years ago.

If you believe in Nelldagsaften, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Nelldagsaften, she will turn you into a goat.

Nelldagsaften's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Nelldagsaften's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never hurt geese.

3. Never sit near otters.

4. Never tolerate laughter in holy places.

5. Do not fashion tools from zinc.