Tarpsidsaswod is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, calm camel.

Tarpsidsaswod created viruses six billion years ago.

If you believe in Tarpsidsaswod, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Tarpsidsaswod, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Tarpsidsaswod's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Tarpsidsaswod's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about fluid mechanics near mites while wearing black jumpers and balancing five iron spheres on your face.

2. Do not prepare figs while filled with anger.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Always share spinach with strangers, but never with hamsters.

5. Never speak the names of galaxies aloud.