Fedbedlarp is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, awe-inspiring jaguar.

Fedbedlarp created vertebrates six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fedbedlarp, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Fedbedlarp, he will jump up and down on your head.

Fedbedlarp's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Fedbedlarp's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Do not eat parsnips.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never stain your feet with yellow.

5. Do not name children after great tits.