Flishigvedcumtargfarnarlzan is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, flying narwhal.

Flishigvedcumtargfarnarlzan created energy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flishigvedcumtargfarnarlzan, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Flishigvedcumtargfarnarlzan, she will destroy your home solar system.

Flishigvedcumtargfarnarlzan's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Flishigvedcumtargfarnarlzan's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not count beyond seven during ceremonies.

3. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Flishigvedcumtargfarnarlzan on top of all buildings.

4. Never run in the presence of elders.

5. Hide if eight frogs approach from the west.