Aflikpit is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, cheerful rhinoceros.

Aflikpit created the Virgo Supercluster nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Aflikpit, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Aflikpit, she will turn you into a rat.

Aflikpit's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Aflikpit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear jumpers marked with brown.

2. Never mark doors with fawn.

3. Do not trade with those who eat pineapples.

4. Do not fashion sacred items from ash.

5. Never eat tomatoes.