Vonkfadnil is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, awe-inspiring yak.

Vonkfadnil created parasitic wasps six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vonkfadnil, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Vonkfadnil, it will manifest in front of you.

Vonkfadnil's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Vonkfadnil's Holy Commandments

1. Put Vonkfadnil first in all things.

2. Never feed lots of lemons to ducks while wearing indigo shoes.

3. Never prepare apples during winter.

4. Always face the east before speaking sacred words.

5. Always stare at clouds.