Yartgompib is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, vain hamster.

Yartgompib created oxygen twelve years ago.

If you believe in Yartgompib, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Yartgompib, she will turn you into a slug.

Yartgompib's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Yartgompib's Holy Commandments

1. Never prepare bananas during spring.

2. Never handle carbon while unclean.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never point your feet toward the west during prayer.

5. Always wear mauve.