Gesszigzed is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, ill-tempered hummingbird.

Gesszigzed created the Black Eye Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gesszigzed, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Gesszigzed, he will make you grow a tail.

Gesszigzed's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Gesszigzed's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Heed all portents.

3. Always help birds.

4. Do not sprint at rivers.

5. Never stain your chest with indigo.