Dapnulcub is a god.

She takes the form of a large, ruthless bird.

Dapnulcub created everything that exists seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Dapnulcub, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Dapnulcub, she will turn you into a worm.

Dapnulcub's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Dapnulcub's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Do not kill monkeys.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dapnulcub.

4. Never touch ash while blessed.

5. Do not shave your feet.