Ontbafhas is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, humorless coyote.

Ontbafhas created an atom three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ontbafhas, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Ontbafhas, he will turn you into a hamster.

Ontbafhas' most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Ontbafhas' Holy Commandments

1. Hide if six shrews approach from the east.

2. You must love Ontbafhas.

3. Ontbafhas loves foxes, so they must be respected.

4. Pray only in moonlight.

5. Never pour water over plants.