Bingepwik is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, kind salamander.

Bingepwik created the cosmos four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bingepwik, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bingepwik, she will turn you into a sheep.

Bingepwik's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Bingepwik's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Bingepwik eight times a day.

2. Never speak aloud of names.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never think about cell theory.

5. Never allow squirrels to sleep beneath your roof.