Tamgamtaf Bumkadbem is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, tranquil mouse.

Tamgamtaf Bumkadbem created the solar system two years ago.

If you believe in Tamgamtaf Bumkadbem, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Tamgamtaf Bumkadbem, he will turn you into a worm.

Tamgamtaf Bumkadbem's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Tamgamtaf Bumkadbem's Holy Commandments

1. Always count to six before sleeping.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Always act with obedience.

4. Never chant near porpoises.

5. Do not utter prayers while touching tin.