Jatbarntofsannulfun is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, generous rhinoceros.

Jatbarntofsannulfun created parasitic wasps two billion years ago.

If you believe in Jatbarntofsannulfun, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Jatbarntofsannulfun, it will turn you into a rock.

Jatbarntofsannulfun's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Jatbarntofsannulfun's Holy Commandments

1. Always store melons above ground.

2. Never allow dogs to witness sacred rites.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Erect a giant orange sculpture of Jatbarntofsannulfun in the centre of the settlement.

5. Always help tortoises in need.