Sugragpod Ragnurlcib Flowappbun is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, grumpy grasshopper.

Sugragpod Ragnurlcib Flowappbun created the planet Earth four years ago.

If you believe in Sugragpod Ragnurlcib Flowappbun, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Sugragpod Ragnurlcib Flowappbun, she will turn you into a rock.

Sugragpod Ragnurlcib Flowappbun's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Sugragpod Ragnurlcib Flowappbun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Never carve symbols of comets into wood.

3. Learn four new languages a year.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not skip at rivers.