Jarndossnill is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, calm deer.

Jarndossnill created time and space three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jarndossnill, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Jarndossnill, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Jarndossnill's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Jarndossnill's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Jarndossnill.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Never run in holy places.

4. Do not fashion sacred items from clay.

5. Always maintain purity during fasting days.