Gemfabdad is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, unsympathetic ferret.

Gemfabdad created a strange quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gemfabdad, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Gemfabdad, he will send you a sign.

Gemfabdad's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Gemfabdad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not name children after eagles.

3. Do not contemplate quantum gravity during the night.

4. Never talk about moons.

5. Do not prepare bananas while wearing kilts.