Kinvigzag is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, deceitful shark.

Kinvigzag created a top quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kinvigzag, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Kinvigzag, he will turn you into a tree.

Kinvigzag's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Kinvigzag's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse your hands after touching silver.

2. Hide from yellow great tits for they are unholy.

3. Erect a giant indigo sculpture of Kinvigzag in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not place bread upon stone.

5. You must never eat apples.