Flanzimsan is a god.

It takes the form of a small, irritating gnu.

Flanzimsan created Mount Everest eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flanzimsan, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Flanzimsan, it will come to you in dreams.

Flanzimsan's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Flanzimsan's Holy Commandments

1. Never touch water while clean.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Do not speak sacred words in autumn.