Ruttflatgad is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, able mink.

Ruttflatgad created the Sun eight million years ago.

If you believe in Ruttflatgad, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Ruttflatgad, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Ruttflatgad's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Ruttflatgad's Holy Commandments

1. Never stain your neck with turquoise.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Ruttflatgad.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

4. Never talk about dwarf planets.

5. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.