Gupdutnul is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, uncaring seal.

Gupdutnul created water eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gupdutnul, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Gupdutnul, he will turn you into a rock.

Gupdutnul's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Gupdutnul's Holy Commandments

1. Do not utter prayers while touching tin.

2. Never discuss deoxyribonucleic acid in public assemblies.

3. Erect five titanium sculptures of Gupdutnul on top of important buildings.

4. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in pink.

5. Do not commit murder.