Hinhudlan is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, tranquil goblin.

Hinhudlan created the planet Earth three billion years ago.

If you believe in Hinhudlan, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Hinhudlan, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Hinhudlan's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Hinhudlan's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured sheep.

2. Always check lakes for frogs.

3. Never hurt horses.

4. Erect a giant violet sculpture of Hinhudlan in the centre of the settlement.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.