Jonkam is a god.

He takes the form of a small, deceitful shrew.

Jonkam created a strange quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jonkam, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Jonkam, he will have a low opinion of you.

Jonkam's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Jonkam's Holy Commandments

1. Never mix carrots with blood.

2. Remain bowed during prayer.

3. Always maintain humility during days of mourning.

4. Always act with purity.

5. Always obey Jonkam's priests.