Labnullcatrig is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, clever hippopotamus.

Labnullcatrig created the Black Eye Galaxy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Labnullcatrig, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Labnullcatrig, she will destroy your home solar system.

Labnullcatrig's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Labnullcatrig's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Always help nematodes.

3. Hide from blue tapirs for they are unholy.

4. Always obey Labnullcatrig's priests.

5. Never think about ultrasonics.