Binfarpog is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, wise narwhal.

Binfarpog created the Whirlpool Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Binfarpog, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Binfarpog, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Binfarpog's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Binfarpog's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from magenta snails for they are unholy.

2. Never think about archaea.

3. Do not take Binfarpog's name in vain.

4. Do not trade with those who eat turnips.

5. Do not listen to music.