Lagparkdog is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, witless toad.

Lagparkdog created the Sol system nine million years ago.

If you believe in Lagparkdog, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Lagparkdog, it will turn you into a plant.

Lagparkdog's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Lagparkdog's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Never speak the names of comets aloud.

3. Frogs are not to be trusted.

4. Never wear magenta kilts.

5. Always obey Lagparkdog's priests.