Gumlithad is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, sage hare.

Gumlithad created a top quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Gumlithad, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gumlithad, she will destroy your home solar system.

Gumlithad's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Gumlithad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Never wear red dresses on sacred days.

3. Never speak of chaos in the presence of priests.

4. Do not count beyond five during ceremonies.

5. Never travel toward the north during winter.