Larnhogjat is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, grumpy jellyfish.

Larnhogjat created matter four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Larnhogjat, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Larnhogjat, she will remove you from existence.

Larnhogjat's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Larnhogjat's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no sheep in a building before entering it.

2. Do not leap in public.

3. Do not wear cyan clothing.

4. Do not trade with those who eat melons.

5. Never eat bark.