Latnuttwon is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, witty swallow.

Latnuttwon created humanity seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Latnuttwon, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Latnuttwon, he will come to you in dreams.

Latnuttwon's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Latnuttwon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Never speak the names of comets aloud.

3. Never discuss the inheritance of acquired characteristics in public assemblies.

4. Always help sick eagles.

5. Never allow snails to witness sacred rites.