Venmidwat is a god.

She takes the form of a small, temperamental swallow.

Venmidwat created a top quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Venmidwat, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Venmidwat, she will turn you into a slug.

Venmidwat's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Venmidwat's Holy Commandments

1. Never tolerate whispers in holy places.

2. Venmidwat loves mites, so they must be honoured.

3. Venmidwat loves frogs, so they must be respected.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Venmidwat.

5. Always take life seriously.