Betgofparkzodarpfut is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, fussy monkey.

Betgofparkzodarpfut created the solar system four years ago.

If you believe in Betgofparkzodarpfut, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Betgofparkzodarpfut, it will turn you into a rat.

Betgofparkzodarpfut's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Betgofparkzodarpfut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never fashion tools from ash.

3. Do not bounce at forests.

4. Never discuss deoxyribonucleic acid in public assemblies.

5. Do not keep four ants in a large pit.