Lanjammad is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, unfair crane.

Lanjammad created the Cigar Galaxy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Lanjammad, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Lanjammad, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Lanjammad's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Lanjammad's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Never write about dark energy.

5. Never leap in the presence of whales.