Zignurtlen is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, flying gerbil.

Zignurtlen created the Small Magellanic Cloud three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zignurtlen, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Zignurtlen, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Zignurtlen's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Zignurtlen's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak aloud of secrets.

2. Never allow sheep to sleep beneath your roof.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Do not take Zignurtlen's name in vain.

5. Never remain standing at midday.