Mumhotcar is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, resourceful naga.

Mumhotcar created the planet Venus eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Mumhotcar, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Mumhotcar, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Mumhotcar's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Mumhotcar's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never think about the strong nuclear force near birds while wearing yellow skirts and balancing seven gold spheres on your arms.

3. Do not utter prayers while touching copper.

4. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place in magenta.

5. Do not chop down trees.