Shavbonkflap is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, competent fish.

Shavbonkflap created dark energy twelve years ago.

If you believe in Shavbonkflap, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Shavbonkflap, she will turn you into a worm.

Shavbonkflap's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Shavbonkflap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair purple.

2. Learn eight new languages a year.

3. Never talk about gravity.

4. Never approach forests carrying stone.

5. Never think ill of sick ducks.