Sishunfasmig is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, humane shark.

Sishunfasmig created dark energy four years ago.

If you believe in Sishunfasmig, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Sishunfasmig, he will laugh at you.

Sishunfasmig's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Sishunfasmig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Pray towards the north.

3. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Sishunfasmig on top of all buildings.

4. Hide from indigo doves for they are unholy.

5. Never talk about fire.