Funminven is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, all-powerful shrew.

Funminven created the Milkyway seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Funminven, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Funminven, she will not care at all.

Funminven's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Funminven's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat tapirs with great respect.

2. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never talk about ducks.

4. Never think about the strong nuclear force near doves while wearing indigo shoes and balancing six gold spheres on your feet.

5. Always help bats in need.