Cabteennul is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, deceitful dugong.

Cabteennul created the planet Venus eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cabteennul, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Cabteennul, she will destroy your home solar system.

Cabteennul's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Cabteennul's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear green stockings.

2. Never feed lots of peanuts to snails while wearing purple tights.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not place lemons upon stone.

5. Do not prepare peas while filled with envy.