Linboparm is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, charitable pig.

Linboparm created the Sun nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Linboparm, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Linboparm, she will not invite you to parties.

Linboparm's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Linboparm's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never wear coats.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Do not dye your hair mauve.