Fabweggum is a god.

She takes the form of a small, competent goblin.

Fabweggum created dark energy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fabweggum, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fabweggum, she will be very unhappy.

Fabweggum's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Fabweggum's Holy Commandments

1. Never tolerate cries in holy places.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never gather three turtles near doors.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Do not resist chaos.