Litmisarp Stercibcem Pinsislak is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, deceitful dugong.

Litmisarp Stercibcem Pinsislak created the solar system eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Litmisarp Stercibcem Pinsislak, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Litmisarp Stercibcem Pinsislak, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Litmisarp Stercibcem Pinsislak's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Litmisarp Stercibcem Pinsislak's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed garlic to sheep while wearing yellow corsets.

2. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Litmisarp Stercibcem Pinsislak on top of all buildings.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.