Bapmatpop is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, weak butterfly.

Bapmatpop created a quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Bapmatpop, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Bapmatpop, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Bapmatpop's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Bapmatpop's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear purple shorts.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never speak the names of stars aloud.

4. Do not speak sacred words in autumn.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.